The week of insanity has begun! So, at work, for the next 10 days, we are conducting a huge exercise. A massive, coast to coast exercise. And, for me, that means working an insane amount for the next ten days. It's shaping up to be something like 120+ hours in ten days. 12 hour shifts (that are really more like 14), only 1 break day, it's gonna be tough for a couple of different reasons.
One, B. With J sailing the high seas, the nanny and my loving family are really stepping up. I am super, super lucky that I have these options (even if we certainly pay for them). Our nanny is nothing short of a saint, she is flexible and willing to help out when I need it. And, thankfully, my father will be coming up to watch B over the weekend. While I am confident that B will be well cared for while I am toiling away, I sure am going to miss him. I will be leaving in the morning before he gets up and getting home after he goes to sleep. It's really tough to be the only parent and then to not be available. Mommy guilt, much?
Two, pregnancy. I have mentioned already that I have not really had the resurgence of energy that I experienced in the second trimester of my first pregnancy. This time, I feel beat down pretty much all the time. I feel like I drag through my days and have zero energy by the time that I get home from a normal work day, so the prospect of these long days just isn't appealing. Plus, there is the simple fact that there is a lot of planning that goes into working that long and with pregnancy that is double. I'm not going to lie, I eat a lot when pregnant (and not pregnant), so I need to have enough food to sustain me for that period when I come in in the morning.
Three, that's just a lot of work! No matter how you slice it, that's a lot of work. And, it's not easy work, it is challenging, brain bending work. You have to be able to think on your feet and react to what happens in a super short period of time. And, being a LT in a room full of CDRs and CAPTs, there is some pressure to not be a dummy (even though they a lot of times sound like dummies).
So, I have to admit, I am a little bit stressed out. I have tried my hardest to prep the house (BTW we have painters there this week) and make sure that B is prepped. He has food, diapers, clean clothes, all the stuff he needs to make it a week without mom. I slept as much as I could over the weekend to get myself physically rested. Even still, I can't shake that feeling that this week is going to be hell.