Molars. Sickness. Diana's Breaking Point.

Well these past couple of days have been a doozy. Just unbelievably challenging. B was sick, I was sick, B was teething. It kind of felt like the stars were aligning against us to see just how much we could handle before we cracked (which occurred!).

It all started with B having a running nose and a little fever. He was super, super fussy and just a little pill. I thought he had some kind of cold and would get over it soon. Then I looked in his mouth and saw two ginormous teeth peeking out of his lower jaw. Molars. The dreaded molars. So that was Friday.

Saturday. B continues to fuss non-stop. There was a period of time where he just walked around crying. Nothing could console him. Teething tablets, oragel, tylenol. No dice. Then, I started feeling crummy. Nothing in particular felt bad, just a general icky feeling. B slept terrible that night and so did I. I was having trouble breathing through my nose and my throat hurt.

Sunday. Begin the bad days. This day can only be described as one snotty, tearfilled mess. I was sick, B was sick, the teeth hurt. Both B and I spent the majority of the day sleeping. I would sleep while he slept and cat napped on the couch while he played in the living room.

Monday. Rock bottom. I get up and head to work. Work takes one look at me and sends me home. People actually told me I looked terrible. To my face. I get home. B is starting to get over the sickness, but the teeth are kicking into high gear. We have more periods of wandering crying. He can't sleep. Which means I can't sleep. This is the day I break. I finally give up and take B into the shower with me. I was so achy that all I wanted to do was sit in warm water and feel sorry for myself. So, we throw on our bathing suits and we sit in the shower for 30 minutes. He plays with toys, cries, plays more. I wish for sleep.

Tuesday. Upturn begins. Return to work to be sent home again. B is completely over the sickness, but teeth are still bothering him. We have more luck with naptime, we watch a movie together. Overall, a much better day. I still slept alot, but didn't feel nearly as bad.

So, here we are on the other side. J called last night and told me I sounded sick (thanks for the update!). I told him that we survived, but just barely. This is the toughest time that I have had with children so far. I know that I should count myself lucky that we have made it this far with so few problems. But, being sick, with no help, with a sick kid is no fun. There was a couple of hours where I truly felt like a failure as a parent. I couldn't console my child, I couldn't even drag myself off the couch. Ah well, we made it through. Can't wait until J gets home to get out of the house ALONE! Maybe I'll take a nap.

The Hug!

Sometimes when J is out to sea and it is just me and B and the pets, I get a little bit down in the dumps and feel super overwhelmed. Well, this has been the case this week, but then B did something that just completely lifted my spirits. He gave me a hug. An actual hug. He put his arms around my neck, put his face against my shoulder and squeezed. I about melted to the floor.

J has been gone for a couple of weeks now and we still have a couple of weeks to go. It's been tough, I have been totally slammed at work with what has been widely refered to as "the impossible task." It has been taking a bunch of time and mind power so when I make it home, I am a little bit drained. Then, I have to walk the dogs, make dinner, and the various other nightly tasks associated with being an only parent. By the time B hits the crib at 7, I am thoroughly exhausted.

So, this hug came at just the right time. It made me think about all the little developments that B makes everyday that I sometimes overlook or take for granted. He truly is a great kid and I am thankful that he is as agreeable that he is. He makes the time that J is gone a little bit more bearable.